Homer's Travels: Music: Foxboro Hot Tubs, Mystic Knights Of The Cobra, and Girls With Guns At The Roxy

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Music: Foxboro Hot Tubs, Mystic Knights Of The Cobra, and Girls With Guns At The Roxy

WARNING: Some of the band links are NOT SAFE FOR WORK (NSFW) and are not appropriate for MOMS, especially the Mystic Knights of the Cobra. Click at your own risk

Yesterday afternoon things took an unexpected and wonderful turn. There was this band that we'd wanted to go see but they were not touring (as far as we knew) and we didn't know when they would. Last week, our friend the "J" told us that her sources had told her that the band would be giving a show in a small, intimate venue, the Roxy Theatre on Sunset, in Hollywood.

After some investigation we discovered that the tickets would only be sold on the day of the gig and you had to be there in person to get the tickets. While this would not be a problem for me, the Wife could not take time off work so close to finals. The "J's" source could get two tickets, but not three. Our hopes were dashed. That changed at about 4:45 PM on Tuesday.

The phone rang, it was the "J", and her source came through with another ticket. WOO HOO! Who were we so excited to go see? The Foxboro Hot Tubs. Some of you may be cool and know who they are, or you may be like me and, have no idea who they were. The Foxboro Hot Tubs is actually an alternate name for a more well known band. You may know them as Green Day.

It's a little hard to believe but the Wife and I actually thought about turning down the tickets. It was a little short notice, it was a school night, and I was tired. Fortunately we decided to go for it. We scarfed down dinner and the Wife got some school work done before we made the hour long drive down the the Roxy.

We got to the Roxy and went in. As we were getting wrist straps put on, some strange lady look at me. You could tell from the look in her eyes that she expected I'd recognize her. I had no idea who she was and I just moved on.

I saw the "J" sitting in the VIP section. The lady in charge of the VIP area was letting us sit there but we would have to move later. I definitely wouldn't want to argue with her. She was dressed in black with large safety pins, skull-n-crossbones dammits in her hair, and enough metal on her fingers to give a knockout blow to Tyson. The table she sat us at was reserved for ... Billie Joe Armstrong, lead singer of the Hot Tubs/Green Day. The Wife then let us know that a new milestone had been reached in her life: She'd farted on Billie Joe Armstrong's reserved seat. The greatness of the event was second only to blowing chunks on Warren Buffet's front yard.

We sat talking in load voices over the loud pre-concert music, which, by the way, was pretty good. The "J's" source, her brother who works as a sound engineer for Green Day along with doing the video and photography for some of their shows, stopped by and introductions and thank yous were exchanged. He seems like a cool guy. The strange lady came back and gave me that knowing look again but I still didn't recognize her. Never did find out what was up with that. Soon after, the first band came out on stage.

The Roxy is an intimate venue. I would guess the farthest you could get from the stage was about 40 feet. We were probably never more then 20 feet from it most of the night. The first band, an all girl band, was Girls With Guns. Can't say I enjoyed them. The only thing worse then music sung by their drunk lead was when the drunk lead tried to talk to the audience between songs. She even suggested that they would sound better once the audience was drunk. The crowd didn't agree. They did a half hour's worth of music before they left to the delight of the crowd.

After Girls With Guns left the stage, we left the VIP section and joined the standing mass in front of the stage. That's when the Wife discovered a disadvantage of her stature. She could see over most of the crowd but, when you try to look over people your head tends to tip back. When her head tipped back, her bifocals would kick in and she still couldn't see the stage. Height, and good eyes, do have advantages.

The next band was the Mystic Knights Of The Cobra (Link is NSFW! and may offend many. You should at least turn OFF the sound - You have been warned) . They were awesome. The melodies were catchy but the lyrics ... raunchy as all get out. The band is large - I counted at least 10 members on stage at any one time. It seemed that the group got bigger with each song played. We especially liked "El Camino" and "I Am Batman". I'm tempted to buy their CD but I could never play it in public. After their set we saw one of the guys (Big, fat, sweaty) and told him he was great. He gave the Wife a big sloppy hug. I think she was a little disgusted with the sweaty sliminess of the hug.

After the Cobras it was time for the big show. The Foxboro Hot Tubs got on stage and totally ROCKED! People were continuously rushing the stage at Billie Joe's request. The band and audience were stage diving. This was great until so many people were on stage that there wasn't anyone to catch the stage divers. A couple dorks hit the floor pretty hard. It was fascinating watching the bouncers pushing people off the stage. The crowd were dancing, jockeying for position, and, at times, fighting. We were close enough to the stage that we were sprayed with beer that Billie Joe threw out over the crowd.

Have you ever noticed that in the crowd there's always some dude in a ball cap and jacket who looks like a serial killer looking for his next victim? There were two in this small crowd. One was wearing a backpack - The Wife and the "J" called him the "Boy Scout". I always wonder what's in the backpack and why they would let someone in with a backpack in the first place. The security people would not let them up on stage - I don't blame them.

It was a totally awesome evening. The "J" even hooked us up with free T-Shirts. That "J", what's not to love. She really came through. We left the Roxy pretty much deaf. I woke up this morning and I swear my right ear is numb. Awesome!

Thank you "J" for everything.


  1. No prob, Homer! Glad I could pay you back for all the wonderful trips & happy times you and the Wife have shared with me. Next adventure...Middle of America!!!
    the "J"

  2. Oooooh I am so jealous!

    I need a "J"!

  3. Ok, everyone needs a "J"!

    I had such a great time. I felt younger for a few hours!

    I think Billie Joe would have liked to know that I farted on his chair. It's a punk rocker's dream to have a fan like me.

    Having been doused in beer from Billie Joe, I have to say it reminded me of my second baptism from Bono of U2. I was in the sixth row and he threw sweat on me.


  4. Re the ball cap dudes - they're tapers. See this Rolling Stone article.

    Or ask the Godson :).

  5. "J": Your witty banter has always payed for the roadtrips. You are a great traveling companion. We now owe you big time. See you in Omaha!

    JaG: Everyone needs a "J"! She's awesome!

    Wife: I agree ... AMEN

    BM: True but why do they have to dress so obviously? Is there a taper dress code or something? You would think security would have check their hats and bags since there was a strict no recording policy at the concert.

  6. Dude, I so need me a "J"! Can I order one online? ;)

  7. GH: You may be able to but I think it would be illegal in most places. ;-)